Fear

7 Steps to Battling Fear – The Short Version by Kimberly Ehlers

by Kimberly on May 5, 2011

Since audios aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, I decided that I’d really love my “readers” out there to be able to get their hands on these 7 steps.  Now, the audio goes into MUCH more detail – this is just a cheat sheet ;) .  I hope that it gives you some solid footing and helps you gain the upper hand on fear.  If you decide you would like more information, the full audio is still available.  You can listen to it here http://kimberlyehlers.com/?p=1881 or download it to listen on your player of preference!

Because of our children’s illnesses, we have a lot to worry about.  It seems as though fear is forever knocking on our door.  We may fear the unknown – what is going to happen next, what kind of life will my child have?  We fear that our child will not have a future.  Maybe, right now, you’re frightened of the medical bills that are growing. 

If we let them, our fears will swallow us whole.  We need to actively battle them so that they do not consume us or rob us of an abundant life.  “The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly,” (John 10:10, NKJV).

An abundant life for yourself may not seem important to you now, but it is for 2 reasons.  God wants it for you, and your family needs you to live abundantly.  We can try to hide our thoughts and feelings, but both are reflected clearly in our actions or merely by the look on our faces.  As Proverbs 23:7 tells us, “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.”  That goes for moms too.  Our families know us.  They know when something is wrong.  Even more dangerous is that our “moods” can plant rotten seeds into our child’s life.  They learn from us, and will learn to be fearful.

Let’s look at our 7 steps to battling fear:
1.  Talk with God daily – I love Paul’s advice, really an action plan to prayer, “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus,” (Philippians 4:6-7, New King James Version).  When something has you worried, pray about it, praise God for what He’s done (that’s also our act of remembering and reassuring ourselves of His greatness), and He will give you peace.  Avoid the temptation to think you have to be worry free to come to Him first.  I encourage you to read Philippians 4:4-8.  Sometimes when we look at just one verse, we miss the context and abuse it (or abuse ourselves by misunderstanding it).  These verses tell how to live with Christ – a life that would naturally ease your anxieties.  I actually have a lot of thoughts about this, and if you’d like to hear them, you’ll need to grab the audio :) . 
2.  Spend time reading God’s word every day – It really doesn’t matter where you start.  For this time in your life, I highly recommend any of the Gospels so that you can hear the loving words of Christ Himself.  You may want to do devotions – like The Faith Challenge.  Whatever you use as a guide, make sure you are reading to allow God to speak to you.  You need to feed your mind and spirit on His truth regularly!
3.  Apply God’s Word – It’s not enough to just read Scripture.  We need to be able to carry it with us in our hearts, ready to be used.  “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God,” (Romans 12:2, New King James Version).  We are transformed by our time with God – praying and reading His Word.  That’s why we read the Bible to hear what God has for us.  He wants to use Scripture to heal us, teach us, and equip us with the tools we need for this life.
     To help in that transformation process, I highly recommend journaling.  It allows you to remember, process, and look back on what God is teaching you.  It’s hard to believe, but we do forget!  (The Israelites weren’t so different from you and me :) .)
     My next recommendation is to focus specifically on what God says about His love for your child, what He says about faith, miracles, and healing.  Right now, these are the areas you need to fortify yourself with the truth in.  The enemy is going to attack us over and over again with lies, fears, and doubt.  We need to be able to combat his attacks with the word of God.
     On the audio, I gave a few suggestions on how to find those verses.  To keep this article short, as I promised, I will just share a couple here.  One of the freebies you receive when you sign up for my ezine, The Heart Connection, is a mini e-book called “Prayers and Promises”.  It has some excellent Scriptures and prayers that are just perfect to use in battle.  We can share verses with each other on my Share the Sweetness page.  There are a few great verses there, and I hope we can build it up together to make a wonderful resource.  Then, there’s “The Faith Challenge”.  It is jammed pack with exactly the kind of verses you need – I’ve done all the work for you.  I also help you to apply it to your life and remove the barriers the keep you from believing and trusting what God is telling you.
4.  Rest – The fact is, we’re easy targets for worry, fear and doubt when we’re tired.  Our defenses are down.  We’re more sensitive and tend to find ourselves agreeing with and wallowing in negative thoughts.  Look at what keeps you from sleeping well and make a plan to regain your precious rest.
5. Worship - Praise God through song and prayer.  Praise Him throughout your day.  When you do, you are turning the tables on the enemy.  Your determination to praise God will frighten and frustrate him.  Oh, he won’t give up, but you’ve changed the tide because, now, he can see that peace of God that is guarding your heart and mind.  That peace zaps him of his power.
6. Find positive support - You need people who are not afraid to pray for the very best for your family.  Search long and hard for those special, but rare, individuals who will boldly pray for healing.  Because these people are difficult to find, please know that I will always join you in prayer.  Send an e-mail to me at Kimberly@kimberlyehlers.com and let me know how I can pray for you and your child.  Join our Facebook page.  It’s just getting kicked off, but there are already some precious people there.  Let us know how we can pray for you.  (To join, just go to the right side of this page, click “Find us on Facebook”, and then click the “like” button.  You can also sign up for my ezine there and receive your free copy of “Prayers and Promises”.)
7. Feed your spirit – What do you love to do?  What activities give you joy?  Talking to a friend?  Taking a walk?  Make time to do things you enjoy and be there in the moment.  Don’t let your mind wander to other things – especially worries!  Battle fear with being happy!

OK, there you have it!  Your 7 Steps to Battle Fear cheat sheet!  I do hope you’ll take the time (oh, that found fit step #7 nicely!) to listen to the audio for more tips and information on each step.  I would love to see you battle fear successfully – I know that you can!  After all, with God all things are possible!

In His Love,
Kimberly

{ 0 comments }

7 Steps to Battling Fear Audio by Kimberly Ehlers

by Kimberly on April 20, 2011

Fear is such a huge thing in our lives.  When your child has a serious illness, there seems to be an endless supply of things to worry about  and outcomes to fear.

Fear drains us of energy, robs us of joy, and leaves us living defeated lives. 

Grab a cup of coffee or tea and find out what goodness God wants for you and the 7 steps you need to take to battle fear.

In His Love,

Kimberly

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

audio: click arrow to listen

To download: click "7 Steps to Battling Fear"

 

 

Links You Need:

Free Bible Search - www.biblegateway.com/keyword/

 

Share verses with one another at - http://kimberlyehlers.com/share-the-sweetness-by-kimberly-ehlers/

To join our ezine and receive Prayers and Promises - http://kimberlyehlers.com/join-the-heart-connection/

To find "The Faith Challenge" -http://kimberlyehlers.com/my-products/the-faith-challenge/

Kimberly's system to memorize Scripture -http://simplycharlottemason.com/timesavers/memorysys/

 

{ 0 comments }

Hope for a Life Free of Fear by Kimberly Ehlers

by Kimberly on August 9, 2010

“The wicked man flees though no one pursues, but the righteous are bold as a lion,” (New International Version, Proverbs 28:1).

Picture with me the scared little man hiding in the shadows.  He crouches down, eyes wide, seeing every movement around him.  He fears the results (real and imagined) of his bad choices seeking their payment.  They are the consequences and he knows he has to suffer them.  Ironically, he already is suffering and they haven’t even found him yet!  BUT, if they catch up to him, their punishment would be worse than living in fear, or so he believes.  He is the wicked man, living with the results of his wicked ways, always sure someone or something is after him.  He is the man King Solomon is talking about.

Can I ask you a couple of questions?  Are you full of fear too?  Has that fear caused you to feel wicked?    Right now, you may feel like that man hiding from the possible results of your child’s illness, the outcome of upcoming tests, or all the “what ifs” that plague your thoughts.  You may be shaking with fear for your child on the inside.  That fear you feel can make you feel guilty too.  It can condemn you, especially through Scripture, and call you, “Wicked!”  It will say to you, “You are not living as bold as a lion.  You are not righteous.  You are that scared little man!  If you were a real Christian, you would not be afraid.  You have failed God.”  Fear loves to point out all the ways we are failing. 

I hope you can take this all into your heart.  It is a lesson I wish I had learned.  For so long, I believed I was failing God in my fear.  If I were a good Christian, my faith should have been stronger, right?  I was failing to trust, to have faith, and to be a good Child of God.  Those feelings drove a huge wedge between me and God.  I was not only afraid but unworthy, so, in shame and guilt, I kept my distance from Him.  Then there were the times my fear caused me to be flat out angry with God – insert another wedge!  Fear is consuming.  It affects who you are and how you relate to God.  It dictates how you see yourself.

Child of God, even though your heart is overcome by fear, it is not you in this passage. There is a BIG difference between you and that man, if you have trusted Jesus as your Savior.  The truth is you are righteous, dear one!  “For as by one man’s disobedience many were made sinners, so also by one Man’s obedience many will be made righteous,” (New King James Version, Romans 5:19).  “For with the heart one believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation,” (New King James Version, Romans 10:10).  Drink in what that means for all of us believers.  Jesus died for our sins, if we believe in Him as our Lord and Savior, He makes us righteous. 

What does it mean to be righteous?  These are some of the definitions I found at bluteletterbible.org: upright, virtuous, keeping the commands of God, innocent, faultless, guiltless, approved of or acceptable of God.  Reread those words again.  Do any grab your heart?  Talk with God about why that word grabs you.  I can tell you that when God has squeezed my heart by words it’s because He wants me to experience healing.  He wants that for you too.

Now, being called righteous doesn’t mean that we always behave righteously.  It’s not a free pass to Sin City.  We can’t say, “I’m righteous, so I can do what I want!”  It also doesn’t mean that we automatically become bold.  It means that we have everything, well, the 1 thing, we need to overcome our mistakes, our sins and our fears.  We have Jesus.  We do not have to wallow in the mire of sin or fear.  Jesus is our Savior from Hell, Satan, and ourselves. 

What does righteous living look like?  First, understand that you can not make yourself “bold as a lion”.  Do not waste time beating yourself up for being more of a frightened mouse than a lion.  If you do, you will only find yourself further from God.  Truly know that we can not conjure up God sized boldness.  We can only receive it.  Embracing and living in our righteousness and its powerful results takes time.  It takes allowing God to work out His plan for you.  He’s going deep after those heart matters that cause your fear in the first place.  He wants to destroy their stronghold.

If you have weeds growing in your lawn, will you choose the weed killer that you have to use over and over again because it just kills the top part of the weed or will you choose the spray that gets down into the plant killing the roots and all?  God wants you to be free permanently from fear.  Just as killing the roots will kill the weed; killing the root of your fear will kill the fear itself.  That takes time because our root systems are large and complicated.  The hurts of life have grown those roots into a messy tangled up ball.

When you recognize that by God’s grace you have been made righteous, you have something more powerful than any fear.  You always have the hope of being “bold as a lion”, no matter what your child’s illness causes you to face.  You have the hope that you will be lifted up out of your worry and fear.  You don’t have to stay crouched down hiding.  God is holding out his hand, extending his righteousness to you.  All you have to do is have the courage to grab on.

Grabbing on is simple.  You pray.  You give every fear that you have to God, asking Him to intervene – easing your worry and working for His very best in this situation.  When Scripture makes you feel guilty, confess the sin it reveals.  If you do not receive the peace of forgiveness, you know it’s a false-guilt – something that isn’t yours to bear.  Pray for His truth and protection from the enemies lies.  Ask Him to forgive your fears and doubts.  You also ask Him to continue to make you righteous and help you to trust Him so that you can be “bold as a lion”.  Then, you sit back and let God work on your root system.  Unlike a weed, this process can hurt us.  Our fear usually comes from something very painful.  To remove it, means to dig it up.  This is when we have to decide to trust the Good Gardner.  He knows what He’s doing and His work will make you flourish as a healthy Christian.  Someday His scared little mouse will become that bold lion all under His wise care.

In His Love,

Kimberly

*********************************************************************************************************************************************

Are you ready to be “bold as a lion”?  Or just wanting to be free of fear?  If so, you are ready for “The Faith Challenge“!  Begin your transformation from scared little mouse to bold lion today!

{ 0 comments }

Our Family’s Big Day by Kimberly Ehlers

by Kimberly on March 17, 2010

Good morning, sweet friends!

Tomorrow is a big day in our family’s life.  We go (bright and early) to the hospital to have Seth’s big post-op check up – with all the tests.  I have to be honest with you, for some reason I’m really battling old fears.  For so many years, I’ve hated the simple little oxygen saturation test that starts each check-up (they just wrap the reader around his finger and it tells them what his oxygen level is).  Finding out how low his oxygen real was was a horrible, depressing way to begin.  My palms begin to sweat just thinking of it.

Another haunt from the past is the old experiences of going to the doctor thinking he was doing well just to be told that he really wasn’t.  There’s a little whisper in the back of my mind that the same thing will happen tomorrow.  Could there be something going on with Seth that I don’t know?

Isn’t it crazy?  I’m frustrated with myself that I can’t  look at this check up with eyes that see the new reality God has given us!   God’s given us totally changed our lives, and yet, I keep reaching back to the past.  I should be dancing!

All I can do is exactly what I’ve been sharing with all of you – give it to God.  Each and every time those worries and fears (even my frustration with myself) creep in, I have to stop and say, “God, I’m sorry for not trusting you.  Help me to trust.  I give you my fear, and I pray that you will destroy it.”  Then I give Him tomorrow and pray that He will be glorified. 

This has also made me think – I hope that none of you ever “hear” from me, “Don’t worry” or that you shouldn’t worry.  It happens when your child is ill.  BUT, I do hope you hear, “Give it to God”. 

It’s all we can do, and at the same time it’s the greatest thing we can do.  Who is there better to give anything to?  I choose to give everything and all of me to the Maker of the Universe. 

“Giving to God” means to truly give it to Him.  We can’t give a piece of it or place it in his hands while still holding on to it ourselves.  Often, we have to battle ourselves not to grab hold of whatever it is again. 

“Giving to God” means to ask Him to take our worry or fear, knowing that He will work for the very best in our situation.  It also means that we determine to live the life of a child of God – cared for, loved, secure, and being used for His glory – and not let anything keep us from our Father.

Thanks for taking a moment to listen to my worries – sharing with friends, always helps :) .

In His Love,

Kimberly

{ 0 comments }

The Million Dollar Question by Kimberly Ehlers

by Kimberly on January 11, 2010

“If the Lord is with us, why has all this happened to us? Where are all His miracles?”

Does is sound like I’ve been eavesdropping on your conversations or thoughts?  Don’t worry, I haven’t!  It’s not you or even me I’m quoting – it’s Gideon, the Man of Valor.

Yep, way before we ever uttered those thoughts, Gideon, who would become a great Judge of Israel, said them to not just anyone, but an Angel of the Lord (Judges 6:13).

Gideon has become one of my newest heroes.  He was so real.  I love that.  I love it when people are real about their feelings.

This wasn’t the only time Gideon doubted God.  Remember the tests he gave God with the dew and the wool fleece, not just once, but twice?  Father, do this, then I’ll know for sure.  Now do this and I’ll REALLY know!

When the time came for battle, after God had diminished the size of Gideon’s army, the Father knew Gideon would be afraid.  He gave him away to over come that fear.  He told him to take a friend and listen to what the other army had to say.  Their words gave Gideon courage.

I don’t know about you, but the life of Gideon speaks to my heart.

How many times have I asked, “Why is this happening?  Where is God? Where are the miracles of the Bible?”  I’ve tested God, wanting some type of clear sign that my son would be OK.  If I had a wool fleece and wasn’t afraid of what the neighbors might think, I would have laid it on the lawn.  To be honest, I preferred a neon sign saying, specifically, “Kimberly, your son will be healed on this date (insert His date).  This is how I’ll do it: (insert “The Plan”).”  I want things to be clear cut.

Like Gideon, I’m a pro at double testing – questioning God’s response with yet another test.  “Is that really your answer, God?  Maybe You could make it clear by doing this too…”.

But, thankfully, also like Gideon, I’ve found God to be patient and understanding.  My doubts, similar to Gideon’s, probably didn’t please Him, but He didn’t turn away from either of us in anger.  Most importantly, He still did what He had planned.  In both of our cases, He did great things for His children – just like the miracles of old.

How many times have I been afraid of what tomorrow held, and how many times has God carried me through my family’s battle?  When your child has a serious health challenge, the battle can be so long.

How about you?  Have you asked the same questions as Gideon and me? Have you felt the same fear?  We all do.  That’s why I’m so thankful for God’s Word.  Not “only” do we get to know Him more, but we get to see ourselves in the men and women of the Bible.  We get to see that God doesn’t call us to be perfect.  He simply calls us to do this life with Him – doubts, fears, Million Dollar questions, and all.

**********************************************************************************************************************************************

Are you asking the Million Dollar Question too and having doubts just like Gideon (and me!)?  Take 25 days to get to know the God we serve and allow Him to erase your fears and doubts – take “The Faith Challenge“!

Let God Be God

December 30, 2009
Sharing is Caring!

When we talk about praying for healing, at some point, someone will remind us that the most important healing is salvation.  There’s no doubt about that, but I wonder if this has become the safe way of saying, “I don’t think God is going to physically heal this person, so let’s protect ourselves from disappointment [...]

Read the full article →

Tying Your Heart to His

December 30, 2009
Sharing is Caring!

A couple of years before Seth was born, God created such a hunger for Him in me that was quite miraculous.  It came out of no where and the questions that filled my mind about Him drove me to seek Him like a mad woman.  I was reading everything I could and asking people questions [...]

Read the full article →