Stress.  Is it possible to parent a child with a serious illness and not experience it?  I don’t think so, but that doesn’t mean we’re helpless and have to live stressed out.  That’s not the abundant life God wants for us (John 10:10).  You’re also a busy mom.  As much as we’d all probably love a day at the spa, it’s hard enough for us to find the time to flip through a magazine let alone spend a whole day relaxing.  Plus, we often need to de-stress NOW, and not wait for a special day or even when we can have time alone. Taking the time to de-stress is important.  Stress affects our health, our relationships, and it not only interferes with our sleep, but it interferes with our relationship with God.

The good news is, you don’t have to have hours of free time to de-stress.  If you follow these steps, you can successfully let go of your anxiety in 5 minutes or less – you can even do this as you sit and wait at the doctor’s office.  Please keep in mind that the length of time it takes you to go through this process will shorten as you practice and become more familiar with each step.  You can also easily make it last longer if you choose to do so.  At the end of this article, you will find a box with each step highlighted.  You can print this page and cut out the box for an easy reference.

Step #1 – Reset Your Minds

The Amplified Bible tells us, “And set your minds and keep them set on what is above (the higher things), not on the things that are on the earth,” (Colossians 3:2).

Life on earth is hard, but to de-stress we cannot allow our thoughts to dwell here.  So, to get started on resetting our minds and de-stressing, we follow these simple steps:

1.  Take a deep breathe in through your nose.  Be conscious of your breathe coming in and filling your lungs.

2.  Slowly breath out through your nose and think of God on the throne, or of Christ with His hands stretched out towards you.

3.  As you breath in, think of the gift God has given us – the Holy Spirit.  Think of Him filling your body with His presence, like your breathe fills your lungs. Continue to focus on your thoughts of God the Father, Jesus the Son, and the Holy Spirit.  Those negative thoughts will try to take over again.  Don’t let them!  Stop them right away and keep you thoughts “set on what is above”.

Step #2 – Lose Your Load

We have a lot of weight to carry on our shoulders.  Hand your heavy load over to Christ and follow His advice, “‘Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For My yoke is easy and My burden is light,’” (Matthew 11:29, NKJV).  Our physical bodies need our help to let go of the load they carry.  Muscles very quickly learn and hold onto stress induced positions and it’s up to us to help them relax.  When we do this, it often becomes easier for us to mentally give our burdens to Christ.

1.  Notice any tension in your jaw.  We don’t always notice it, but it’s one of the first places we will carry stress.  Are your teeth clenched?  Is your jaw jutting forward?  Release that tension by allowing your jaw to relax, then clench your teeth as hard as you can for 15 seconds and release.

2.  How about your forehead?  Often, just by recognizing the tension in our foreheads will cause it to loosen up and go away.  You can help it along by lifting your eyebrows a few times.

3.  Now for your shoulders and neck.  This is usually the first place we recognize we’re carrying tension because it causes pain.  We tend to shrug our shoulders when stressed and this causes the muscles at the base of our neck to work in a way they weren’t designed to work.  They are meant for short bursts of activity.  They were not meant to hold your shoulders up around your ears for long periods of time.  When they have to do that, nerves are pinched and we often get headaches.  Here are a couple of ways to relax those neck and shoulder muscles:

~ Squeeze your shoulders as hard as you can up to your ears and hold for 15 seconds, release.

~ With your left hand, hold on to the edge of your chair while tilting your head to the right.  (Think right ear to right shoulder.)  Then, play with tilting your chin and find the position that gives you the best stretch.  I like to tilt my chin down slightly.  Repeat on the other side.

~ Tilt your head side to side (right ear to right shoulder, left ear to left shoulder).  Continue going back and forth.

Repeat any of these exercises as often as you like.  As you do them, continue to take deep breathes and keep your thoughts on things above.  You can also focus on a verse that gives you peace or an attribute of God.  Thinking about Him as your Father or Good Shepherd can be very comforting.

Here are your exercises to cut out and take with you:

In His Love,

Kimberly

It was such an honor to speak at Cindy Rushton’s Ultimate Homeschool Expo last Monday.  I love the opportunity to connect with other Moms who also have precious little ones with health issues.  I remember feeling so alone when Seth was little.  I’m sure there were other families facing their own health issues, but I didn’t know about them.  It’s such a gift to find friends who really understand.  Even though our situations are different, we are so much a like – parents who love their children passionately and are dependent on God for help.  Parents afraid for their child’s future.
     While making this connection with other moms is wonderful, can I tell you something?  It’s also heart breaking.  I met one mother after another who’s swimming in a pool of guilt.  They may be different looking pools, but the result is the same – they are bogged down in guilt.  I understand how you’re feeling, I’ve been there myself.  Sometimes our pools of guilt come from feeling away we don’t think we should feel.  “I should be thankful instead of worried (or angry or fearful or whatever it is we feel).”  “I should be grateful because things could be worse.” 
     We also swim in guilt for “failing” our child.  We beat ourselves up thinking, “I should have caught it sooner.”  “I didn’t do enough to help.”  “I missed the warning signs.”  When I was pregnant with Seth, we decided not to do an ultrasound.  I can’t help but wonder if we would have had it done, would we have been able to do anything to limit the damage done to his over worked heart?  (His heart was working double time to get his blood where it was supposed to go.) 
     There are so many ways for us to “fail” as parents!  There’s a list of things that we’re not doing well enough.  I should be: more patient, kinder, happier, wiser, more organized, more spontaneous…  We could keep going, right?  But, there’s also the list of things we want to stop doing: being so stressed out, being grumpy, and on and on the list grows.
     Sometimes, we  actually pull ourselves out of one pool of guilt just to dive into the next.  Dear one, God wants us to climb out of the pool of guilt and swim in His sea of grace.  Listen to His words and let them speak to your heart:
      “Seeing then that we have a great High Priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession.  For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin.  Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need,”(Hebrews 4: 14-16, NKJ).  I love The Message’s version, “Now that we know what we have—Jesus, this great High Priest with ready access to God—let’s not let it slip through our fingers. We don’t have a priest who is out of touch with our reality. He’s been through weakness and testing, experienced it all—all but the sin. So let’s walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help.”  Oh, sweet parent, take the mercy, accept the help!
     I looked up the definition of grace at Dictionary.com, and, honestly, was surprised by what I read.  I have been belittling the meaning of grace!  This is how this site defines grace: the freely given, unmerited favor and love of god, the influence or spirit of God operating in humans to regenerate or strengthen them,  also called state of grace.  The condition of being in God’s favor or one of the elect.
     Do you hear that?  We have His unearned favor!  He wants to renew and help us!  Doesn’t that sound so good to your hurting heart?  Let God give you the grace that He so desperately wants to give you.  Your guilt has built up a dam holding back the flood of grace He’s ready to pour on you.  Let Him break down that dam!
     I want to share a lesson that God has recently taught me.  As part of a class at church, I had to make a timeline of the major events (good and bad) in my life.  When I did that, it clearly showed 15 years of one major event after another, mostly dealing with Seth’s health.  I felt God whisper to my heart, “No wonder you were so stressed!”  He always knew it, but I had to see my stress in black and white.  Do you know what else God has done?  Well, He didn’t condemn me, I had done that enough.  He helped me to accept the grace and forgiveness that He had waiting for me behind the dam I had built up.  I’m still learning about His grace, even as I write this, but I’m ready to swim in it, aren’t you?  I want to splash and play and enjoy His favor.  I want to float peacefully knowing that He is there ready to catch me.
     I’m not just saying this to make us feel good.  Let’s look at the heart of God and hear the great love He has for us,
“I taught Ephraim to walk,
      Taking them by their arms;
      But they did not know that I healed them.
      I drew them with gentle cords,
      With bands of love,
      And I was to them as those who take the yoke from their neck.
      I stooped and fed them.”
                                            Hosea 11: 3-4 (New King James)
    

     That’s the Father we serve.  The dependable Daddy holding us by the hand, helping us to walk.  The gentle Father longing for His children.  Let that soak into your soul.  I encourage you to read all of Hosea Chapter 11 to really understand God’s desire for relationship with us.
     I have a question for you.  What would you say to a friend going through what you’re going through?  Would you slap her wrist and condemn her for not being a good enough Christian or mom?  No, as a friend, you would pour out grace on her, wouldn’t you?  You would support and encourage her.  You would pray for her.  When you find that, once again, you’re beating yourself up, please remember this question – what would you say to a friend?  Then, say it to yourself.  If you wouldn’t condemn your friend, don’t throw stones at yourself.
     Now, this is not a license to sin and be cruel.  If there’s one thing we learn from Jesus let it be that He is our Savior.  If we repent of our sin the price has already been paid.  There is no condemnation for us.  “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit,” (Romans 8:1, New King James).  We still sin, but it is not who we are any more.  We are His children.  We are forgiven.  The problem is that we tend to be overly critical of ourselves because of our love for our child and our stress.  We repent and seek forgiveness, but we don’t let Him give it to us.
     Take some time to dream.  Dream about what you want your family life to be like.  What kind of parent do you want to be?  Do you long to be happy and enjoy every moment that you can?  Think about what is most important to you.  What would a wonderful day look like?  Lay that dream at Jesus’ feet and let Him help you chase it.
     It all begins with the determination to get out of the pool of guilt.  Ask Him to destroy the dam you’ve built that holds back His grace.  Then, get ready to swim in His sea of grace!

In His Love,

Kimberly

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Ready to swim in His grace, but have too much holding you down in the pool of guilt?  Get to know your Father while you let go of the fears and worries that keep you stuck with “The Faith Challenge”.

 Ever had an “unbalanced tire?”  Recently, I had a tire that was driving me crazy! It made the ride horribly rough.  I was wore-out just from trying to drive to town because it kept pulling me off the road—obviously in the wrong direction! Just a simple trip to town was completely stressful. My hands were blistered from trying to hold on to the steering wheel the whole way to town and back! I was certain that my car was about to blow up…that something was permanently wrong!  Imagine my relief to find that my problem was from one tire that was out of balance! Easy to fix.  The smooth ride only took a few moments to restore.

     Ever had an “unbalanced life?”  Well, the similarities are unbelievable! Talk about a rough ride! Talk about a pull in the wrong direction! Talk about stress! Sure it is easy to fix—but, oh so hard to do! 

     We are overloaded! Every area of our lives suffers from overload: commitments… possessions… work… information…relationships!

     We are a culture that can be characterized as overloaded!  We are busy. Hurried. Overworked. Stressed. Rushed. We exceed our limits. We take on WAY TOO MUCH! As my pastor says, “We write checks that our body and mind cannot cash!”  Our productivity suffers. Our bodies suffer! Our vital relationships suffer. We no longer can hear God as He whispers direction, encouragement, and wisdom along our path. We miss the best! We wonder why we end our days empty and without meaning or accomplishment.

     We forget what is most important—or at minimum, put it off for another day.  The important seldom screams for attention, but the urgent, often insignificant, constantly screams for MORE and more! We get so busy and distracted doing the urgent and demanding in life that we lose the opportunity to impact the important, that in which we are given to leave a legacy!

     So, how on earth do we get out of this rat race? How are we to restore balance? If we could restore balance, how could we maintain balance?  How could we make life really count for something?  Here are some things that the Lord has been teaching me this year as He has pulled me back from so many GOOD things to restore balance and keep me on the path to leaving a legacy!

SLOW DOWN!

     Does that one hurt or what?  We are so fast paced! We live on the “fast track!”  Think of the rat race we live in:  one-hour print…ten-minute oil changes…instant cameras…instant potatoes…instant MICROWAVE meals! Our homes have dishwashers, slow-cookers (don’t be fooled by the name—turn them on as you run out the door for work and have a healthy meal ready to serve at the end of the day!), microwaves, and computers!  Oh, and the computer thing! Yep, I am on my computer now (at our local coffee shop—yep, priorities are nice at times!) enjoying the benefits of my blessed computer complete with its battery, cd-writer, and all of the other MUSTS that I am so spoiled with!  BUT! For heavens’ sake…think of how spoiled we REALLY are! The computer age has taken over sweet little country stores! We have the Internet (which has faced the demand to have MORE instant connections—remember all of those ads this summer?), E-mail (to instantly communicate!), E-books (to instantly receive our products so we don’t have to wait for the dreaded postal service to deliver!!), E-zines, Auto-responders (didn’t REALLY think those were REAL people there all hours of the day and night??!!), Auto-processing of orders/credit cards, and don’t forget Instant Messenger—for those who find Email to be too slow! We have “Drive-Thru’s” for EVERYTHING—food, cleaners, pharmacies, oil changes, and even (PLEASE GASP WITH ME!) funeral homes!  Well…that is where I drew the line! Drive-thru funeral homes!  Where are we as a culture? On the fast track!

     What do we do?  Why not Slllllooooowwwww DDDDoooooowwwnnnnn???  I am not advocating that we STOP using technology. Rather, we should use those tools to make life easier and to make the most of our time. HOWEVER, where it really matters—relationships, home, family, homeschooling, our witness, life…where it REALLY matters, we must slow down!  Restoring balance and eliminating overload is simply not possible without slowing down!

     Ephesians 5: 15-16 says, “Look carefully then how you walk! Live purposefully and worthily and accurately, not as the unwise and witless, but as the wise (sensible, intelligent people), Making the very most of the time [buying up each opportunity], because the days are evil.”  What does this look like? Well, let’s go back to Genesis 33 for a look at the life of Jacob after he completely surrendered his entire life to the Lord.  “My lord knoweth that the children are tender, and the flocks and herds with young are with me: and if men should overdrive them one day, all the flock will die.  Let my lord, I pray thee, pass over before his servant: and I WILL LEAD ON SOFTLY, according as the cattle that goeth before me and the children BE ABLE TO ENDURE, until I come unto my lord at Seir.” Want to slow down, but how? Where do we begin? What can really make a significant difference? Try these:

–> Decide what is MOST important!  Think over life for a little while!  What is it that only YOU can do in this life? Why did God create YOU? What is your life purpose? What is it that God created YOU to do?  What can go?  Just as our house cannot be cleaned without getting rid of the clutter—otherwise all we are doing is shuffling the clutter around—likewise, we must take an occasional inventory to de-clutter our life!  I find this to be a battle JUST as many of you probably do and trust me, this is a life principle that I really stick to! Long ago, God impressed upon my heart that if I were going to be able to truly fulfill my calling that He had for my life, I would HAVE to only do the things that *ONLY I* could do—if it were something that anyone else on earth could do, it would have to go!  Still, I will go through periods of my life and begin to get overloaded again only to find when I evaluate the value of all that I do, there are things that sneak into my schedule that vie for my focus and energy! Usually that requires that I take out those really tough pruning shears again to cut back—either by delegating the tasks to someone else so I can be more productive at what ONLY I can do—or even more difficult, get rid of what is overloading me! I know that this is hard, but it is SO key! Take a deep look now at what you are doing.  Is it really eternal? Is it the “main thing?” Is it essential?  Can anyone else do it?  Is it hindering you from the very best?  Decide what is most important. You won’t be sorry!

–> Examine Your Lifestyle! Take a little while to jot down a journal of what makes up your day? Your week? Your month? Your year?  REALLY BE HONEST!  Do those things count?  What are the days filled with: things that are really important…or lots of fires to put out?  Take a bit longer to write out what you would REALLY like to be accomplishing.  What do you think that a “perfect day,” if it were possible, would look like? How can you change your day to really slow it down so your life really counts?

–> Examine Your Motives! Motives will fool us in a heartbeat! Scripture is so very true as it warns us to beware of our heart. We simply cannot trust our hearts. They will lead us astray every time!  What really motivates us? What drives us? If we can determine this, we can evaluate activities and obligations much more effectively!  So, what drives you?  Ambition? Your life call? The desire to be in control? Don’t trust others to do things? Passion? Guilt? Ego? Insecurity (Can’t say “no?” Afraid that you have no value unless you are “seen” busy?) Constantly trying to please others?  Revenge? Money? Oh, I could go on and on…motives are so very deceptive and there are so many. What is your motive? What drives you to do all you do?

     Busyness does not mean that we are accomplishing. Nor does busyness guarantee fulfillment.  Often, busyness is the very thing that keeps us from the very things that will bring us satisfaction, fulfillment, and contentment.  Busyness, given the chance, will keep us from fulfilling our life purpose!

     It is all up to us! We can choose which way to go! Enjoy the journey or wait to enjoy the brief delight of the destination? A wasted, bitter, defeated life or a life full of purpose and meaning? Burn out or real accomplishment? Deep, passionate relationships or very real regrets?

     Why not slow down?  Relax? Enjoy the whole journey—the process getting there AND the destination! Build deep relationships! Stick to those priorities! Simplify life so you reach for the very best!  Seize each moment!

REDEEM THE TIME!

     Time! Friend or foe? Have enough time in your day? Or are you a truly kindred spirit, asking God for just a few good 80-hour days and the energy to use them to the fullest? Ha!  I have a good feeling that if your prayer is for that one, that you will also find that God will whisper sweetly in your ear to say that the problem is not that we do not have enough time…or that we are using time to the fullest…or even that we waste time. Rather, He would say that we need to make it our ambition to redeem the time—each and every moment we are given! 

     A few months back, my pastor taught a series of messages entitled From Burnout to Balance.  In his series, he challenged us to look at time as a great big “bank account.”  He said that this account is one that we are guaranteed to have daily deposits made on our behalf by God each and every day.  We each get our fair share.  No one gets more. No one gets less. 

     Think of this awesome gift! Each and every day we are given a gift that can impact all of eternity—or be squandered away into oblivion.  Each day we are given this gift without any regard to our stewardship from the day before! TWENTY-FOUR HOURS! ONE-THOUSAND, FOUR HUNDRED, FORTY MINUTES! EIGHTY-SIX THOUSAND, FOUR HUNDRED SECONDS!  Deposited in our “account” each and every day!

     And…with this gift, we are free to use it in any way we choose.  We can waste it or use it wisely.  We can make a difference—or misuse it!  But! One thing is guaranteed each day with all that is deposited on our behalf—it must be used up before the end of the day…it cannot be carried into tomorrow!

     We all have 24 hours put into our spending account each and every day.  What we do with that time is in our hands! Will we be faithful? Will we use it wisely? Will we make it count for eternity? Will we use our gift to the fullest? Will we use our gift for what really counts? 

     If we want to live a life of balance, we must guard this precious gift!  We must measure our time as one of our greatest resources we have to invest in this life!  This requires that we go back to our precious Giver and seek HIM for how we can most faithfully invest each moment! We must let Him be the Lord of our schedule, our to-do’s, our calendar.  We must commit our way—ALL OF OUR WAY—to Him from our work to our studies that we pursue to our commitments to our books that we read to the activities that we participate. 

     We must be careful to set a guard on our time to be sure that we do not flippantly do without thinking or take on too much that we forfeit the best!  We need to purpose to really do those things that are “NEEDFUL” (remember Luke 10: 38-42?) and not just the “stuff” that we think MUST be done! We need to constantly evaluate our choices and weigh them to see if they are truly those things that help us to reach our life call. 

     Time…what do you think? Redeem this precious gift so our lives can be balanced? You bet!

SELL OUT COMPLETELY TO GOD’S WILL!

     Does this scare you to death? Are you seeing visions of little grass huts…no electricity…bugs…complete with the stench of underarm odor?

     Oh, beloved! My first image of total surrender to God admittedly envisioned life on a continent that was far, far away from all of the comforts of home. Still have no idea if there is a continent that could be as disgusting as my visions were.  Sure, I trusted God for eternity, but never thought of heaven in the same way that I thought of my life on earth totally surrendered to Him!

     Now, as we move into our 21th year as a ministry, I HAVE to tell you that God has a very, very good plan for us!  He does not call us, equip us, and then send us to an assignment that forfeits our trust and confidence in Him!  In fact, one thing that I am thrilled to say is that although there IS work in our calling, there is delight and fulfillment that cannot be found in anything else under the sun! Seeing His provision is unbelievable. Watching His anointing fall is indescribable!  Plus! No grass huts so far!

     Give your ALL to God!  Sell out! Don’t hold anything in reserve!  Abandon ALL for the call!

     Scared? Just give Him a try! Take a look at Jeremiah 29 in The Message Bible.  God says to us, “I know what I’m doing, I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I’ll listen.  When you come looking for me, you’ll find me. Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I’ll make sure you won’t be disappointed.”  Oh, beloved, not only will you never, ever be disappointed, but you will find that His GOOD plan will be truly good–satisfactory for you, satisfying, fullfilling, completely sufficient!

     Wonder JUST WHAT could YOU do?  Too young? Too old? Too poor? Not qualified—or so you think? Well, beloved! Know that God has called each and everyone of us to function in His Body.  We are the mouthpieces here on earth for Him. We are the feet for Him. We are the hands here in our community for Him! He has called and equipped each and every one of us to be a part of His Body here on earth! We each have talents, spiritual gifts, natural bents and interests, and experiences that can minister to those that are growing in the Body AND those that need to join the Body of Christ!  God needs ALL of us working and functioning properly if His Kingdom—His way of doing things—will come to earth!  He needs for us to be that light that shines in the darkness to bring others to Him.  Just go into a dark, dark room… Light one candle… See what a difference YOU can make right where you are!

     Have no idea what His plan is for you?  Take a look at Romans 12: 1-2.  He promises in verse two that YOU can know His good, perfect, and acceptable will for you!  Yes, YOU can know that plan!  How? Going back through this passage, we see how:

–> Become a living sacrifice—EVERYDAY!  Completely yielded. Completely dedicated. Completely committed to Him and His Way!  Giving Him our ALL! All that we are: our plans…gifts…bents…talents… ambitions… ideas… methods… techniques… fears… delights…concerns… all presented to God as a living sacrifice EVERY SINGLE DAY! If we truly desire to know the good, acceptable, perfect will of God for ourselves or our children, we must first obediently present ourselves as a complete, living sacrifice.  There may be things in our lives (things that are very precious and difficult to get rid of) that must be burnt up as a sacrifice for us to be prepared to receive God’s very best OR we may find that what we bring to sacrifice before the Lord is acceptable in His sight and can return home with us (like Abraham as he willingly prepared to sacrifice his beloved Isaac).  However, the key is not in what God does with our sacrifice, it is in our heart coming before Him daily, presenting ourselves and all that we have before His throne!

–> Don’t not conform to the world; but conform to Christ!! Yep! We either conform to the world or to Christ! We cannot live for one without forsaking the other!  Want to know God’s plan?  Let go of the world’s standards, the world’s ways, the world’s requirements, the world’s traditions, and the world’s bondage. Let go of the lies of the world! We must stop serving the world at the expense of becoming ALL that God wants for us to become! If we want to live an abundant life—a balanced life—the world’s way will never work!  Only God’s way brings balance, freedom, and true, abundant LIFE that we are really searching for! As we grow in relationship with Christ, daily become LIKE HIM, we find security and LIFE! We find peace! We find hope! We find the direction that we have been looking for all along the way!  We find freedom to become ALL that God designed for us to become! Talk about LIFE! We move beyond balance to abundant life! 

–> Be transformed by the daily renewal of your mind! The last key to getting to know God’s plan!  However, this one is SO VITAL!  If we truly want to live a balanced, abundant life, we must sell out to God’s will. BUT, however much we want to sell out, unless we truly let Him change our life, we will just spin our wheels in the same ruts, never becoming all that God wants for us to become! How is our mind transformed? Life changed? This life transformation begins as we sit at the feet of Jesus.  As we daily immerse ourselves in His Word, we will begin to be transformed.  Then, we will soon have different priorities… different beliefs… different ambitions… and soon, we will be able to prove what is good, acceptable, and perfectly in the will of God.  If we never experience this transformation, we will always find ourselves burdened under a yoke of bondage.  We will always find ourselves looking in all the wrong places for direction, approval, meaning, purpose, and rest!  We will constantly battle overload. We will find life bumpy and pulling us into life’s “ditches!” 

     God has a precious plan EVEN for you! Surrender ALL to Him! Let Him have it all! Let Him do His work in you! Don’t rush! Don’t drag around! Don’t run from it!  Live EACH day letting Him have your ALL in complete abandonment! Balance will come—but, beloved there is so much more that will rush into your life! Purpose, meaning, abundant life! Go for it!

BUILD MARGIN—BREATHING ROOM—INTO YOUR LIFE!

     Ever been at rock bottom?  We see many of our favorite Bible characters that we get to know during good times, but I think my favorites are those that we get to see when they are rock bottom, with NO breathing room, at the point that my mother would have said, “I’ve HAD IT!”  Ever just “HAD-IT?”

     Imagine for yourself the grief and utter pain that Job was experiencing as he cried out in Job 3:26, “I have NO peace, NO rest, NO quiet!”

     Drop into the conversation with Paul as he declared that he got to his “breaking point” in 2 Corinthians 1: 8-9, “For we do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about the affliction and oppressing distress which befell us in the province of Asia, how we were so utterly and unbearably weighed down and crushed that we despaired even of life itself.  Indeed, we felt within ourselves that we had received the very sentence of death, but that was to keep us from trusting in and depending on ourselves instead of on God Who raises the dead.”

     Finally, journey back to 1 Samuel as we are first introduced to Hannah at the point of utter desperation—you probably know a bit about her story. Barren. Broken. Taunted (by her husband’s other WIFE!! Who had NO problem bearing children!). Empty. Crushed in soul. Oh, let’s join her at the point that she had “HAD IT!”… “Crushed in soul, Hannah prayed to God and cried and cried—inconsolably. Then, she made a vow: Oh, God-of-the-Angel-Armies, If you’ll take a good, hard look at my pain, if you’ll quit neglecting me and go into action for me by giving me a son, I’ll give him completely, unreservedly to you. I’ll set him apart for a life of holy discipline…” As she was praying, she sunk even lower as she was completely misunderstood by the priest, who thought she was DRUNK!  We hear more of her heart in her reply to him… “Oh no, sir—please! I’m a woman hard used. I haven’t been drinking. Not a drop of wine or beer. The only thing I’ve been pouring out is my heart, pouring it out to God.  Don’t for a minute thing I’m a bad woman. It’s because I’m so desperately unhappy and in such pain that I’ve stayed here so long!”

     Relate?  I know that these precious vessels were crying out in the midst of trials and life events that were too much. However, I don’t think that we find ourselves at the point of desperation without first pushing limits for quite some time!  We haven’t got margin to deal with the daily-ness of life—much less those life struggles, crisis situations, losses, and persecutions that inevitably knock most of us off our “rocker” into despair!

      Think about it…if you are the average person in our society today, you live on fast-food, crazy hours, no sleep. You are chronically rushed (or late), overworked, exhausted, overloaded! What is the solution?  Build MARGIN! Build some BREATHING ROOM!  Simplify life so there is room for change…space for disruptions.  How?  Here are some suggestions that I am trying to implement in my own life:

–> Accept HUMAN Limitations!  Can you sense how HARD that is for ME to type? Oh, here it where it gets harder, it is not MY idea, it is the Word of God too: “I have seen that EVERYTHING HUMAN has its limits and end no matter how extensive, noble, and excellent.”  (Psalm 119: 96a)  OUCH! If there is a battle for balance (and YOU KNOW there is!), this is one of the biggies! We ALL have limits! But, where we need more margin is that we don’t say “NO” when we face limitations!  As I shared above, we “write checks our body and mind cannot cash!”  The world says, “You can have it ALL!”  “You can do it all!”  Even the church gives the illusion that “I can do ALL THINGS through Jesus Christ.”  However,  the Bible is very clear that we can ONLY DO those things that are HIS THINGS—HIS WILL! WE have limits! We have space limits. We have body limits. We have emotional limits.  Jesus does not give us a blank check to do ALL THINGS. Much less, Jesus WILL NOT empower us to do ALL THINGS.  He only empowers us to do those things that HE CALLS us to do.  He never gives us anything that is beyond our abilities  and resources to do.  One clear way to judge what we are called to do from those things that  we are not called to do is to look at our limitations: our red lights, shut downs, overloads, crashes.  We need to look at those warning signs: pain, fatigue, stress, irritability, frustrations.  Our human limitations are God’s boundaries in our lives that help us to know that we are overextended and writing checks our bodies and minds cannot cash. Respecting human limitations will restore balance to even the most overloaded life!

–> Expect Interruptions!  Proverbs 22:3 says, “A prudent man sees trouble coming and ducks—a simpleton walks in blindly and is clobbered!”  If there is one thing in life that is FOR SURE, we can be sure that life seldom goes as planned.  Life cannot be predicted.  Just think about it…what truly messes up your schedule?  Traffic? Car trouble? Delays? Crisis situations? Special needs along the way? We must plan for interruptions or our lives will constantly be out of balance, our schedules will never work, and much of life will be squandered!  Expect interrruptions and plan room for them into every day!

–> Put SPACE Into Your Schedule!  Ever had your PDA/Planner/Calendar/ Briefcase complain about an overstuffed schedule?   Actually my planner looks so much more “professional” when it is PACKED OUT! Only I don’t handle it so well! For the last few years, I have really evaluated what I was doing that was causing me to get off my schedule and not get around to all of my to-do’s.  Now, granted, some days it is ME or my darling little ones!  But, overall, 95% of my schedule woes are also the culprit behind life getting just way too busy—OVER-SCHEDULING!  Schedules, like daily life, only work when there is SPACE in each day! Just like we see with the life of Christ (see Matthew 5-10), our life is filled with distractions, interruptions, crisis situations. We can battle against these OR we can add margin (space) into our lives that gives us room to use these as THE MAIN THING—opportunities for ministry, opportunities for the very best lessons, teachable moments, hands-on discipleship!  Not only are we able to step up to the call as it beckons us, but we are less likely to spin out of balance constantly!

–> Prune Life To Yield MORE Fruit!  Several years ago, one of my dearest friends bought her DREAM land.  Every time that I go to visit her, our family laughs because just driving up her driveway I begin to see a view that rivals that of the gorgeous view on The Sound of Music, thus tempting me to begin to sing—“The HILLS ARE ALIVE…with the sound of music…”  The land is gorgeous.  But it is more than that. It is also productive!   However, at first it wasn’t.  Rhea bought the land, complete with an orchard.  Sound ready to go?  Well, not exactly! Needing a bit of help with her fruit trees, she called in a professional.  To her shock, she looked outside to find her precious orchard looking like a bunch of sticks in the dirt. Pruning began to have a whole new meaning! What looked like devastation actually was the key to those best fruit ever! Bigger fruit! Sweeter fruit! MORE fruit!  I remember the year that Rhea was getting her first fruits after the pruning. It was a year that I needed that practical example of pruning just so I would have the nerve to let God loose with His pruning shears! I can’t say it was easy! It was probably one of the most challenging times in my entire life. I had lived my life pretty much just without much thought. However, God was wanting for me to yield up EVERYTHING  so He could prune back all that was diseased…all that was broken…all that was zapping my strength…all that was causing double-vision…all that was keeping me from bearing the fruit He had planned from the foundation of the earth.  1 Corinthians 6: 12a says, “Everything is permissable (allowable and lawful) for me; but not all things are helpful (good for me to do, expedient and profitable when considered with other things).”  There are many GOOD things that God would not have a problem if I were to do them.  However, those good things can keep me from producing all of the fruit that I can bear. It becomes a choice thing for me.  I can choose whether I will allow Him total control of my entire life—even the schedule… commitments… my going… my doing.  I am the ONE who can sit down, yield to the shears, and stay ready to bear more and more fruit. Likewise, I can also resist.  But…I don’t really like that alternative!

     At the end? At your limit constantly? “HAD IT?”  Take a good look look at life! Check for margin! Not enough? Build margin! Create space! Watch what happens!

DE-STRESS!

     Yep! Gulp! De-stress!  This one got you out of whack before too?  You are not alone, beloved!

     Want to know the #1 complaint in our culture?  What about among homeschool moms? The booger behind despair? The reason that most quit?  The reason that many never begin?  You have got it! The stress! The chaos! The mess! The lack of organization or ability to “keep it together.”  Want to battle for balance? This little devil will give you quite a challenge!

      Yep! If there is a need among the body of Christ, this JUST might be it!  But, how?  Here are some quick tips for restoring balance when it all gets bumpy from the stresses of life…

–> Find Your Stressors! What throws YOU for a loop?  What takes you into a “nose-dive?”  What “stalls” your flight? What are your biggest stressors?  What causes YOUR stress?  Identify the REAL culprit—HINT: it is NOT your husband (!!) or your children (!!) or God (!!).  Look at your life honestly!  What REALLY stresses you out? Holding onto your stress? Carrying a burden you do not have to carry? Anxiousness? Discontent? Strife? Expectations? Willfulness instead of willingness and total surrender and total abandonment? Find YOUR stressors! Know what REALLY “punches” your buttons!

–> PLAN! Plan ahead! Well in advance! One saying that always pops into my head when I think of the word plan is, “If we fail to plan, we really plan to fail!” Nothing brings MORE stress than living life without direction, without a plan, always under “crisis” management, making decisions on a moment-by-moment basis.  If this is stressing you out, try to plan ahead! Plan out your goals. Plan out your schedule. EVEN the mundane things—plan out those daily routines, even going so far as to write them out! How does this help? Well, decisions are made, saving those precious brain-cells for other uses! Trust me this works WONDERS! So, plan! Plan well! Don’t wait until the last minute! Plan…then, you can settle in to go a slow pace!

–> Write it DOWN! Give your brain a rest! Talk about stressing out—our brains will stress out if we are keeping all of our to-do’s…plans…goals…heartbeats…EVERYTHING on our brain! Write it down! Not only will it help to keep things from slipping between the cracks, but it will also help us to evaluate where we have come from and where we have to go.  Plus, the best yet! We will have a sense of accomplishment when we look back!

–> Watch that attitude! There are going to be some life-stresses that quite honestly cannot be changed! However, we need not walk in a life of defeat and stress! Instead, when we recognize life-stresses that cannot change, that is the time to sit right down at the feet of Jesus! Ask Him to show the purpose. At minimum, KNOW that victory is guaranteed! There is no temptation or trial that is original with any of us! Nor is there anything that we are allowed to walk in that is not first filtered through the loving hands of God. He always guarantees VICTORY!  So, watch that attitude! When things cannot change, change what can—that perspective…that attitude!!

–> Delegate! What is it that makes it so hard for moms to get help? Our children LOVE to be Mommy’s helpers! We really steal their blessings when we do not delegate to them.  Even toddlers can help fold a load of laundry! Don’t try to do it all by yourself!  Delegate and you will find some of the stress dissipating!

–> Get enough rest!  Oh! This one is soooo tough for me! But, let’s honestly look at what happens in our families when we get tired:  don’t get enough sleep>get cranky>don’t enjoy life>not too great to be around> others get cranky> irritates you more>get more tired… Why not simply get that rest?? Sleep AND that rest in body, spirit, and soul!

–> Self-control!  Hummmm… Such a challenge!  However, we will find ourselves constantly stressed out until we learn to say “NO” to those activities, commitments, all that stuff!  Bit-by-bit, they wear us down. Saying, “NO” eliminates the whole threat of stress from the onset!

–> Keep it simple! Don’t overload! We already KNOW we cannot do everything, but we have to remember this when choices are there to be made! Always look at anything new, whether an activity or a possession, judging its importance by what you are willing to swap for it.  This works for everything—shoes, books, activities, commitments. Keep it simple! You can’t do or have everything, so go for the very best!

–> Give yourself a break!  Don’t pick yourself to death NOR let others pick you to death either!  It is so easy to focus on the negative, get overwhelmed by the weaknesses and inadequacies, and get frustrated about how far you have to go! Then, PEOPLE sure do not help! Let another person loose in your life with the license to critique you or your situation and you will be ready for the nut-farm!  Give yourself a break! See this thing as a process—you will not arrive until it is all over but the shoutin’ so relax, enjoy life, and give yourself a break!

–> Find ways to fill your cup!  We are each wired so very different. Certain things stress some of us that do not bother others. Likewise, certain things just fill our cup!  STOP! Step back! Shift into low gear –or reverse!  Do what it takes to DE-STRESS!  Rest! Relax! Rejuvenate! Renew! Refill! Whatever it takes, find those things that fill YOU back up! Oh! The benefits go beyond de-stressing and restoring balance—you finally have living water to pour forth into the lives of others!

–> Make the most of EVERY minute!  Cherish this time! Make sweet memories! Take time for the most important—the best things! Your husband! Your children! Your family life!  Don’t let life just slip by! Look at life and decide what you would do if this were your last year…last month…last week…last day?  Would you go to the park to enjoy watching them play?  Would you cuddle up and read a great book? Would you take off to the beach?  Why not make those things YOUR thing? Oh, and probably find that education can be EASY along the way too!

     De-stress!  Crawl up into the great big comfy arms of our loving Heavenly Father! Let Him hold you during the most turbulent or trivial stresses of life! Let Him restore your spirit! What you are doing is vital! Your enemy wants you stressed out, overloaded, out of balance!  He is defeated! When he snarls, throws forth his darts, and lies to you, just snuggle up closer to your Lord! Give Him the struggles! Give Him expectations! Give Him every single burden! You won’t be sorry!

GET BACK TO THE MAIN THING! RELATIONSHIPS!

     Remember Matthew 22: 37-40?  Jesus was asked, “What IS the most important thing? The bottom line? The main thing?”  I love Jesus’ ability to summarize ALL of life in ONE response! He summed up the main thing in three commands: to love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and body…to love others as ourselves…and obviously, to love ourselves!  Do you see this? The MAIN THING…the BOTTOM LINE..THE most important thing was relationships!  However, when we get overloaded, the very first thing that we skimp on is relaitonships!

     Want to restore balance and get rid of all of that overload?  Take a deep look at the MAIN THING!  Anytime things are out of balance, take a look to see how relationships are doing? Are they being “put off” until the pressures go away?  Are they quiet while the rest of the “stuff” screams, demands, and pulls you to pieces? 

     Ask God to constantly keep you attuned to relationships in which you are charged with ministry.  Ask God to show you ways that you can love and minister to Him.  Ask Him to quicken you all along the way with ideas and precious opportunities for ministering to those you are called to minister to—your husband, your children, your parents, your siblings, those that come within your sphere of influence. Cry out to Him to help you guard your time so moments do not slip away leaving a hole in this vital area of life!

SO…WHAT DO YOU THINK???

     Ready to get out of this rat race? Ready to restore balance? Make life really count?  Sit at the feet of Jesus! Snuggle up close! Listen for each beat of His heart! Let Him pull you back  from that “stuff.” Let Him show you how to let go of those GOOD things and grab onto the very best!  Give Him a chance to restore balance and set us on the path to leaving a legacy!
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Need MORE Help?
 
How about the ULTIMATE mom-time? Yep! Check out our Ultimate Homeschool Expo 2010! Cindy Rushton is the hostess of the Ultimate Homeschool Expo, the very first online homeschool convention. She is recording Preview Chats for the 2010 Ultimate Homeschool Convention RIGHT NOW! Join her wonderful guests FREE as they count down to the Ultimate Homeschool Expo (May 3-7, 2010–BUT! NEVER ENDING because it is an ONLINE Convention!). Check out all of the details here:

Ultimate HomeSchool Expo 2010

I’m so excited!  The Ultimate HomeSchool Expo 2010 is coming soon!  Don’t know what that is?  That’s OK.  Check out this link to find out much more: Ultimate HomeSchool Expo 2010

I’m thrilled to be one of the speakers this year! I’ll be teaching a workshop on homeschooling children with health issues – it will be so good!
Cindy Rushton is the amazing hostess of this incredible event, and she’s blessing us today with this super fun and super important article. It’s not just for homeschoolers or just for moms! It’s for anyone who’s a parent and dealing with stress. Enjoy!
In His Love,
Kimberly

50+ Ideas for Taking Care of Mom!
By Cindy Rushton

Tired? Weary? Need some fresh ideas for taking care of mom? Feeling that push and pull on you as you balance all of the many demands in your life? Are you great about taking care of others, yet not quite so good about taking care of YOU? Has it been a long, long time since you have done the little things to just fill your cup back up? How about a few fresh ideas for filling your cup and ministering to your heart! I promise that these will be easy for you to do! Here goes:

–> Grab Your iPod and go for a long, long walk! I LOVE my iPod. I have it filled with great Praise and Worship music, teachings and workshops, podcasts, tutorials, etc. My iPod has become my “pocket pal” when I work on my chores, take care of business duties, or even get out for my walk. Talk about my best investment of 2006!

–> Laugh! Just sit there right now…laugh! Start small…just a little giggle! Then…laugh about laughing! Roll on the floor laughing! Feel better?

–> Begin a new Bible Study. Either find a Bible Study guide…or dig out Words to study on your own! For Word Studies, I LOVE my Strong’s Concordance. It helps to find all of the references of a certain word of interest. I also love my Vine’s Dictionary. I use it to look up the meanings of the words AND it also has other references for uses in Scripture. Another great help for Word Studies is my good old faithful Webster’s 1828 Dictionary. I LOVE it as a reference to deepen the studies. Usually it helps me to also find OTHER great studies to dig into also! Dig into the Word! It will feed your heart and soul during this tough time!

–> Meet a friend at the park and let the kids play while you visit.

–> Go for a drive around the city—look at the lights! Look at flowers. Look at the seasonal changes.

–> Look at photo albums. Remember the silly stories!

–> Watch the sunrise! Or, not an early bird? Watch the sunset!

–> Collect jokes and funnies! Barb Johnson…Chonda Pierce…Becky Freeman are just a few of my PERSONAL favorites! Get one of their books or videos. Then, snag some mom-time to just kick back and enjoy!

–> Chocolate! Chocolate Candy…Chocolate Bars…Chocolate Shakes…Chocolate Latte’s…CHOCOLATE! REALLY! Chocolate helps to release endorphins in the brain—plus! It tastes great to boot! So, why not grab a bit for mom-time!

–> Watch an old movie! Curl up under a great big quilt—even if you have to turn the air down COLD! Don’t forget to turn down the lights and turn off the phone!

–> Look at your old school albums! Your HAIR! Ha! Enough said.

–> Got a grassy hill nearby? Go to the top and just roll down it! Like a child! (Snowy? Get a sled! And SLIDE!)

–> Take the kids to the park—just WATCH them! They are adorable!

–> Begin a “Quote Book.” Collect quotes that encourage you to keep on, keeping on! Keep them in a special journal dedicated only to keeping your special quotes.

–> Memorize your favorite Psalm. Try out Psalm 91…or Psalm 61…or Psalm 35…or Psalm 37…Oh! Enjoy!

–> Begin a Tea Ministry. Doing for others ALWAYS lifts even the heaviest spirit. Get a tea basket to keep your goodies in…visit a shut-in…bless them. Then! Watch the blessing boomerang! You won’t be able to leave without a blessing.

–> Take the kids to a candy store—sample the Jelly Bellies…or Sweet Tarts…or Sour Gummy Worms.

–> Fly a kite!

–> Take a ride in the country. Turn up your praise music…roll the windows down…sing to the top of your lungs!

–> Watch a funny video! Elisabeth and I LOVE to watch old movies like If a Man Answers. It is one of our “chick flicks” that we always watch together. We love it! SO FUNNY! Chonda Pierce is another one of my picks. She is just totally hilarious. My children LOVE old comedy shows like I Love Lucy or The Three Stooges. Oh, you may want to watch anything! Just find something that will make you laugh hard!

–> Scrapbook! Pick photos that you MUST tell the story behind! Kick up your favorite music…spread out your goodies…and Scrap till you drop!

–> Read a biography of a GIANT in the faith! My favorites are Corrie ten Boom…Hudson Taylor…George Mueller…Amy Carmichael…Jim and Elisabeth Elliott…etc!

–> Get today’s newspaper and read the comics!

–> Get a yo-yo! PLAY!

–> Make Chocolate Chip Cookies with the kids! On a diet? Take them to someone who blesses you! Include a note of thanks and encouragement for all they do to bless you!

–> Go out and sit on your boat—watch the stars! (Oh, watch the sunset or sunrise, if you can too!)

–> Dig into the Bible and study what God says about trials…suffering…faith…death…depression…oppression…warfare…battle…

–> Read a new book! Normally ready non-fiction/how-to’s? Get a fiction book for a change! Normally read fiction? Get a humorous book! Renew your weary heart and mind!

–> Take a break and go for a long ride on a motorcycle! Don’t forget your headset and praise music!

–> Take a hike! Really! Find a nice nature trail OR go for the tough stuff!!

–> Go to the mall with your teenager! ENJOY!

–> Buy a Mp3 Player and some great praise music—turn it up! I LOVE my iPod! I have my iPod loaded with all of my favorite CDs. My favorites are Michael W. Smith’s Worship CD’s AND Hillsong’s Praise and Worship! The moment you enter into worship, you will enter into the very presence of God—so, turn it up and devour the presence of our precious Lord!

–> Pull out that old sewing machine and make some of those goodies that you have been wanting—new purse/tote…outfit…home decorations…doll clothes…etc!

–> Buy a “whoopee” Cushion…or “Bubba” teeth… At least your family will laugh!

–> Write out the funny family stories! Reminisce! Enjoy!

–> Go skating!

–> Try an afternoon of “Laser-Tag” with your teens! Get um!

–> Make Homemade Bread—KNEAD yourself!

–> Plan a regular Mommy Getaway. This is not an extra! It is essential! I plan getaways for different purposes: to just get alone with God to hear Him, to plan, to work on my homeschool and business projects, to just fill my cup back up. Decide what will fill you up. What do you need right now? Decide what will help meet that need. Gather your goodies: Bible, journal, iPod, camera (I love taking pictures of little treasures along the way), your planner, your computer/Idea Notebook, etc. Pull aside and take that time to just get-away and fill your cup back up!

–> Get a pet! My bird, Harley, has ministered to my heart MORE than I could remember! He is just SO funny! HE had the idea to “boogie” for Jesus! I had not danced for years! AND it is decent! Elisabeth’s new puppy, Pooh, is a TOTAL delight! I say all the time that she is JOY in fur! She has become my little buddy. She loves to sit with me while I work and follow me around while I am doing my chores. She keeps me in stitches. Struggling? Get a pet just for YOU…see that puppy in the window??

–> Take the day to go for a flight! Look at the whole world from a different perspective!

–> Dance! Turn up your favorite music and dance! Dance your heaviness away! Dance till you laugh! Dance in worship to the Lord! Jump! Lift your hands in praise and worship!

–> Clean out your house (only if this is NOT your struggle! Ha!). Attack those closets…cabinets…dusty bookshelves…paper piles!

–> Go out for a cup of coffee…tea…or a good old Coca-Cola! Meet your sweetheart or a mommy pal! Or…take your Bible and make it a special time with the Lord!

–> Find some silly-putty or slime—PLAY!

–> Get up earlier (or take regular breaks throughout the day!) for your quiet time! You may feel SO weak that you can barely concentrate—if so, just turn on praise music and lift up your arms in praise and adoration. Watch what happens! Make a list of your heartaches—lift them to the Father (then, hide them in your Prayer Journal—later they will be a praise record!). Dig into the Word for comfort…perspective…and hope for tomorrow! Really tough days? Well, when the Israelites had very HOT days, they had to gather MORE manna—in the heat of your battles and toughest trials gather a surplus! It will help you survive your struggle.

–> Make a quilt. You can EVEN cheat by making it on the sewing machine! ENJOY!

–> Take an afternoon to go to the movies. Get a big bucket of popcorn…a super-HUGE Coke…sour Gummy Worms (unless you are due a BIG DOSE OF CHOCOLATE!). Take your sweetheart…or a friend if you want to share! Pick a movie that will make you laugh like crazy…OR CRY your eyes out! ENJOY!

–> Ride three-wheelers! Get MUDDY!

–> Treat yourself to a leisurely afternoon (or a bunch of afternoons!) at the pool…park…or creek.

–> Try your hand at BOWLING. Take some friends!

–> Take time for tea—each day.

–> Exercise. Swim…walk…jog…hike…go skating…aerobics. Relieves stress AND boosts your health to boot.
Learn a new hobby! What have you been putting off that you have ALWAYS wanted to know? Pottery? Quilting? Flight Training? Smocking? Scrapbooking? Jewelry Making? Sewing? Crochet? Horse-back riding? Go for it! Now is the PERFECT time.

–> Treat yourself to a nice looooonnnnnngggg Bubble Bath! Don’t forget to set up your favorite music to play during your Bubble Bath. Also…be sure to fix a nice cup of tea (or a Latte!) or a nice big Coke that will last till the water gets cold! ENJOY!

–> Go to the park and just swing—HIGH!
Go get an ice-cream cone—with a double dip!

–> Do a “Promise” hunt in Scripture. Keep in a “Promise Notebook” of your very own! KNOW that they are yours.

–> Snuggle up for the afternoon to read a great book!

Got some fresh ideas? Don’t let this limit you! Let your brain GO! Find some things that will fill you back up and take care of you all along the way.

This is not an extra. This is an essential. Carve out time on your calendar today to just take care of mom!

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Need MORE Help?

How about the ULTIMATE mom-time? Yep! Check out our Ultimate Homeschool Expo! Cindy Rushton is the hostess of the Ultimate Homeschool Expo, the very first online homeschool convention. She is recording Preview Chats for the 2010 Ultimate Homeschool Convention RIGHT NOW! Join her wonderful guests FREE as they count down to the Ultimate Homeschool Expo (May 3-7, 2010–BUT! NEVER ENDING because it is an ONLINE Convention!). Check out all of the details here:

Ultimate HomeSchool Expo 2010

Good morning, sweet friends!

Tomorrow is a big day in our family’s life.  We go (bright and early) to the hospital to have Seth’s big post-op check up – with all the tests.  I have to be honest with you, for some reason I’m really battling old fears.  For so many years, I’ve hated the simple little oxygen saturation test that starts each check-up (they just wrap the reader around his finger and it tells them what his oxygen level is).  Finding out how low his oxygen real was was a horrible, depressing way to begin.  My palms begin to sweat just thinking of it.

Another haunt from the past is the old experiences of going to the doctor thinking he was doing well just to be told that he really wasn’t.  There’s a little whisper in the back of my mind that the same thing will happen tomorrow.  Could there be something going on with Seth that I don’t know?

Isn’t it crazy?  I’m frustrated with myself that I can’t  look at this check up with eyes that see the new reality God has given us!   God’s given us totally changed our lives, and yet, I keep reaching back to the past.  I should be dancing!

All I can do is exactly what I’ve been sharing with all of you – give it to God.  Each and every time those worries and fears (even my frustration with myself) creep in, I have to stop and say, “God, I’m sorry for not trusting you.  Help me to trust.  I give you my fear, and I pray that you will destroy it.”  Then I give Him tomorrow and pray that He will be glorified. 

This has also made me think – I hope that none of you ever “hear” from me, “Don’t worry” or that you shouldn’t worry.  It happens when your child is ill.  BUT, I do hope you hear, “Give it to God”. 

It’s all we can do, and at the same time it’s the greatest thing we can do.  Who is there better to give anything to?  I choose to give everything and all of me to the Maker of the Universe. 

“Giving to God” means to truly give it to Him.  We can’t give a piece of it or place it in his hands while still holding on to it ourselves.  Often, we have to battle ourselves not to grab hold of whatever it is again. 

“Giving to God” means to ask Him to take our worry or fear, knowing that He will work for the very best in our situation.  It also means that we determine to live the life of a child of God – cared for, loved, secure, and being used for His glory – and not let anything keep us from our Father.

Thanks for taking a moment to listen to my worries – sharing with friends, always helps .

In His Love,

Kimberly

This could also be the most important thing I ever write.

If you have a child with serious health challenges, you are probably suffering from a terrible disease and don’t even realize it.  It’s so important that you become aware of it and begin the battle for your health.  No, it’s not a disease of the flesh and bone.  It’s a disease of the soul, and it’s just as deadly.  It grows from lies and is fed by stress and guilt.  If this disease continues to flourish and grow, it will destroy God’s creation – you.

This article is different then most.  It’s much longer than a regular post so I’ve made it available to you as a  FREE download.  To read more of this very important article, follow this link.  If you would like to download it, please right click and then choose Save Target As.   To print, simply click as normal.

God has laid so much on my heart to tell you, please don’t miss what He wants you to hear!

In His Love,

Kimberly

Just when I think life couldn’t get much better (my son has a normal oxygen level for the first time in his life, praise God!), God gives me a wake up call.  “Things aren’t so great,” He tells me.  “You’re carrying around some junk that will destroy you and the ones you love if you keep it hidden, but alive and well, in the darkest part of your heart.”  OK, He didn’t say exactly that, but after the dust settled, it was the message I received very clearly. 

My Friday evening started off so well!  I got to go to an all ladies jewelry party.  It was so much fun to look at pretty things with other women.  As a homeschooling mom, I cherish those times!  When I had left home, my son wasn’t feeling the best – he was suffering from a headache that just wouldn’t stop.  After the party, before beginning the drive home, I called to check on him.  My husband informed me that Seth had gotten worse, he had been sick to his stomach too.

When I got home, Seth had made his bed in front of the toilet.  I checked his temperature, no fever.  The pain from the headache was just bad enough to make him sick.  As I sat with him and talked, he got sick again, missing the toilet for the most part.  It was a mess to clean up – him and the bathroom.  (Sorry for the gory details, but they are important.)  I scrubbed, my husband remained oblivious to the mess, and the ugliness rose inside of me.  I just knew he wasn’t helping because he had already cleaned up a mess earlier.  In that instant all the messes I’ve had to clean up, all the bloody diapers I changed (caused by severe food allergies), all the trips Seth and I made to the doctor and hospital filled my whole being.

As the main caregiver of a child with multiple medical problems, that’s what life is all about most days.  You are constantly checking to make sure everything is OK and responding when they’re not.  I wondered how my husband could ever feel that cleaning up one mess was enough.   I felt belittled, like all I’ve done didn’t matter and wasn’t noticed.  The ugliness grew and grew.  Truth mixed with lies.  I angrily and sarcastically thanked him for his help.

Bitterness.  It filled me, oozed out through my words and actions.  I hadn’t even known it was there, yet now it was consuming me.  It destroyed the peace in my home for too long.  I hate to even think of how witnessing my bitter response affected my son.  What scared me the most was how bitterness shut my heart off completely from feeling love.  Love was the last thing I wanted or cared about.  The acknowledgment of all that I had done was what mattered. 

Finally, God broke through my wall and I was able to explain my feelings to my husband.  He hadn’t realized how stressful Seth’s medical problems had been for me.  Because I am the main caregiver, there has been a lot that my husband hasn’t had to deal with – he, after all, is working to support us.  I was able to talk openly and honestly about it all, and he’s beginning to understand. 

My husband has been able to embrace our son’s healthy new life.  He’s made the switch from having a boy with multiple heart defects to having a boy with an almost perfect heart very easily.  While I rejoice in this new life, it hasn’t been so easy for me to change.  My role is changing.  Fears have been put to rest.  My days are completely different now.

And now’s the time for my healing too.  All I can do is ask for forgiveness from Him and those I hurt, and turn myself completely over to His care. 

Our falls and our failures don’t feel good.  We would love to handle every situation as a perfect Christian would.  I am so thankful that God doesn’t call us to be perfect.  He just calls us to love Him.  His grace and His desire to make our lives better will always amaze me.  He could leave me to nurture and grow my bitterness, and it would become my master.  Bitterness would dictate what I did and how I lived.  I would live for that beast instead of for Him. 

I thank God for hitting me over the head with a lesson I needed to learn.  Just as He operated on my son’s heart to bring it healing, He operated on my disease to give me health.

How about you, dear one?  Ready to let God operate?  He’s the great surgeon.  Let Him into your heart to do the work that needs to be done.

In His Love,

Kimberly 

Ready to remove any bitterness that’s hiding (or maybe it’s not so hidden!) in your heart?  Let “The Faith Challenge” bring you healing.  You can find it at:

www.kimberlyehlers.com/the-faith-challenge