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How to Survive Your Child’s Illness by Kimberly Ehlers

by Kimberly on March 7, 2012

My hearts desire, the purpose of this site, is to help you stay close to God throughout your child’s illness because He is the “secret” to your survival.  By survival I mean facing each and every day knowing that, come what may, God is with you, in control, and working for your child’s (and your) good.  In that knowledge you can experience peace, faith, and even joy instead of fear, doubt, and stress.  Surviving also means knowing that when you fall short of being the mom or daughter of God you want to be, you can start over again.

Every post, every edition of The Heart Connection, and every product in my e-store has been created to serve that goal.  I’ve realized, though, that all that I’ve made is very spread out, and I wonder how a hurting mom coming to my site would find what she needs to survive.  How can I give her (how can I give you), what she needs when she needs it the most?

Your mental/emotional survival is dependent on your faith. Your faith is a gift from God that grows when our mind sets and emotions are healthy and inline with our Father.

That’s why I made “A Guide to Parenting a Child with a Serious Illness”.  It’s the jumping off point from which you can strengthen 4 key areas necessary for you to not only survive your child’s illness but to see you faith thrive in a time you need it the most.  Your mental/emotional survival is dependent on your faith.  Your faith is a gift from God that grows when our mind sets and emotions are healthy and inline with our Father.  We are holistic beings.  Every aspect of our lives is connected and effects one another.  Working on these 4 keys will bring you much needed healing and put you in the safest place on earth – held by His strong arm next to His heart:

 Key #1  – Everyday Life and Taking Care of YOU!

 Key #2  – Create Your Firm Foundation.  It’s All in Who and What You Know!

 Key #3  – Getting Ready for Those Dreaded Doctor Appointments or (Even Worse) Hospital Stays

 Key #4 – Building Up Your Support System and Watching for Warnings

There are, altogether, over 20 resources listed under these keys.  I encourage you to start with Key #1 and work at your own pace through each article, audio, or download.  It will take time to work through each Key and that’s good!  You don’t want to rush the work God wants to do in your heart.  Oh, did I mention that this guide is completely free?  All I ask is that you share it with others if you feel it would bless and help them.

Are you ready to go beyond surviving?  Here’s your link to your guide Go to Guide

In His Love, Kimberly

Picture of keys found at http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=151

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Why Not Let Him? by Kimberly Ehlers

by Kimberly on December 11, 2011

     My family and I are reading “Tabitha’s Travels – A Family Story for Advent” by Arnold Ytreeide.  We have enjoyed all 3 of Mr. Ytreeide’s Advent stories for families and are disappointed to have reached the last in his series.

At the end of each little chapter, Mr. Ytreeide adds his own thoughts along with Scripture.  One particular reading ended with such a powerful question, I wanted to share it with you.  From p. 52 of his book, he writes, “We don’t really know what lies around the next corner or within the next year, but there is one thing we can know:  Jesus will be right there with us, protecting us, guiding us, or simply helping us endure, no matter what.

Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid.  The LORD, the LORD, is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation.

Isaiah 12:2

     Give your fears to God – fears about the future, fears about other people, fears about yourself.  He’d love to take your fears and give you peace and joy in return.  Why not let Him?”

     Why not let Him?  What is keeping you from being able to hand over your fears to God?   There are so many reasons, aren’t there?  We have such a desire to protect our children and control their circumstances.  We want to help our child.  The problem is that when we put more responsibility on our own shoulders our fears mount.  We know that we really are not in control of our child’s disease or defects.  We can do everything possible and it may not be enough.   Deep down we know (and hate) that we really can not make everything better for our child, but we don’t give up trying.  We fight a winless battle to control the doctors, the tests, the results, the medicines, and the illness.  We can’t give up, can we?  Of course not.  We keep striving and our fear keeps growing.

     There’s also the question:  Can I trust God with my child?  If I let go of control, if I allow Him to be the protector and helper, will He do it?  In our minds, we may know that He loves us and is good, yet our heart wants to gather our child in, trusting no one else with their safety.   Our fear for our child’s future keeps us from trusting Him.

    The fact is, there’s so much to worry about with our kids, it’s easy to be fearful.  Is it really possible to give your fears to God and experience peace, even joy, during your child’s illness?  In the words of Jesus himself, “But Jesus looked at them and said to them, ‘With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible,’” (Matt. 19:16, NKJV).  We can’t defeat our fears by ourselves.  We begin by asking God to take our fears and fill us with His joy and peace instead.  With His help, we train ourselves to recognize our fears.  They may be obvious or cloaked in the need to control or any desire that reveals a lack of trust in Him. We can hand those fears over to God every time they pop up.  This is truly entering into relationship with our Father.  Through this relationship, He really can take your fears.  Why not let Him this Christmas?

In His Love,

Kimberly

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Too Worn Out for Christmas Spirit by Kimberly Ehlers

by Kimberly on December 6, 2011

It’s not so easy to have the Christmas Spirit when your child has a serious or chronic illness.  December can be such a hard month for our kids – the cold weather, the busyness of the holidays, the cold and flu bugs that seem to be everywhere we go.  Your child may be sick right now, as is mine.  You may actually be in the hospital with your little one.  OR your child may be healthy as of this moment, but it feels like a ticking time bomb ready to explode any second.

On top of caring for your child and worrying about their health, you’re suppose to be baking cookies, buying presents, and, well, being merry!  It seems like an awful lot to ask, doesn’t it?

Yes, actually, it is a lot.  You DON’T have to do it all.  Please know, though, that whatever you do (or don’t do) to celebrate Christmas is OK.  It’s OK, everyone will survive and Christmas will still be joyful if you have to put aside some of the things you normally do, like baking those cookies.  Buy some cookies from the store; put them on a Christmassy plate, and viola!  Easy Christmas cookies everyone will enjoy – regardless of who made them.  Now, if baking cookies brings you joy, bake away!  Love every minute of it!  Let it go, though, if the whole idea brings you more stress.
This is about more than just making cookies too.  While others seem to run from one fun activity to the next, you may need to weed them out.  You know what?  I’m sure you know what I’m going to say.  It’s OK!  It’s OK to say no.  More activities do not mean more Christmas spirit or a better Christmas.  Don’t get me wrong!  There’s nothing wrong with the extras.  I look at the parties, the programs, the baking, and the decorating as fun ways to celebrate Christ, but they aren’t necessities.  I encourage us all to say no to whatever causes more stress or keeps us too busy to make Christmas really matter.

He didn’t come to watch us rush from one activity to the next, wearing ourselves out and too busy to talk with Him.

Deep down we know what makes a better Christmas, don’t we?  We know it’s having our hearts centered on Christ.  It’s being and celebrating with our families.  Ezekiel 34:11 tells us, “For thus says the Lord GOD: ‘Indeed I Myself will search for My sheep and seek them out,’” (NKJV). That’s what Christmas is all about.  Our Savior left His Heavenly throne to find us.  He came to give us rest, restore our souls,  to protect and bless us (Psalm 23), and, ultimately, to save us.  He didn’t come to watch us rush from one activity to the next, wearing ourselves out and too busy to talk with Him.  He tells us, “My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me,” (John 10:27, NKJV).  This Christmas, are we listening for our Good Shepherd’s voice?  Are we resting with Him and staying close to His side as we go about our day?  That’s the Christmas spirit, the peacefulness of life with Christ all because of that sacred night so long ago.  While our children’s illness makes us worry and often causes us to “miss out” on the fun, we have an opportunity that others miss in their hustle and bustle.  We’re forced to slow down and even be still.  We’re given the time to listen to our Shepherd’s voice.

I have some resources I’d like to share with you that will help you build up the true Christmas spirit (believe me, some of it’s actually fun!):

In His Love,

Kimberly

kimberly@kimberlyehlers.com

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