Welcome back to our second day of talking about the good, the bad, and the ugly of labels!
Most adults do not allow kids to call each other names. We would see it as bad behavior and correct it, right? If we believe names like “Fatso”, “Shrimp”, and “Four-Eyes” (sorry, I know those are actually pretty mellow compared to what people call each other these days, but it’s the best I could do!) why do we see names like “Heart Baby” and “Cardiac Kid” as endearing? Focusing on what is wrong with someone, even if your child doesn’t have a particular label, is an insult. I’d like to share a couple of personal stories that I hope show the effects of NOT labeling.
I have a double kidney. Yes, bizarre, but after years of kidney infections as a child, they work just fine. No, it’s not nearly as serious as what many of our kids face. I do wonder what my life would have been like if I would have been called a “kidney kid”. I truly believe that my pretty carefree childhood would have been much different if the adults in my life would have been more focused on my kidneys. My parents could have worried about the unknown – what would happen with this kidney? Would it cause me problems? They could have been more protective of me, making my life revolve round my kidney. (Just a couple of years ago I learned that if I were a boy, I wouldn’t have been allowed to play football. Because of its size, part of my kidney is not protected by my ribs. The likelihood of being hit and damaging the kidney playing football would have too high.) My parents let me be a kid. If they had concerns, they dealt with them. Most of all, I was always Kimberly, their daughter first. Dealing with my kidney was something they just did when they needed too. Hmmm…. maybe this is when my label fighting actually began. Thanks, Mom and Dad!
I also want to share with you Seth’s reaction when I recently told him that nurses and doctors had called him “Heart Baby”. He was instantly angry. He wanted to know why they did that. In his mind, it was mean. I did try to explain that it wasn’t meant to be mean and that it helped them to know how he needed to be cared for. Let’s just say, he didn’t buy it. He stewed and finally said, “That isn’t who I am”. Yes, he probably gets some of that attitude from me 
, but kids just want to be themselves, not their defect or disease. Who can blame them?
There is one label we need to fight for. It’s the label that God gives us and our child when we believe in Jesus as our Savior, “Child of God”. “Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God!” (1 John 3:1a, New King James). (Need more verses? Read John 1:12 and Romans 8:16.)
When we lose track of who we ultimately are, even for what seems to be a Godly purpose (such as ministering to others) we aren’t pleasing our Father. If we live under a label of disease and, possibly even death, we miss out on the blessings and freedom of being His child (after all, our child’s label becomes ours too). We risk minimizing the life that our children do have. He doesn’t want half a life for us or our children. He wants us all to have LIFE and have it ABUNDANTLY! (John 10:10.)
I love the book by Max Lucado, “You Are Special”. In it, the Wemmicks, spend their days giving each other stickers (or labels). A star means that you’re good because you’re pretty or talented or whatever else makes you good enough. A gray dot means that you’re bad because you aren’t pretty, there’s something wrong with you, or you make mistakes. Let’s listen to what Eli, the creator of these label loving wooden people says to Punchinello, who happens to be covered in gray dots, “Who are they to give stars or dots? They’re Wemmicks just like you. What they think doesn’t matter, Punchinello. All that matters is what I think. And I think you are pretty special,” (p. 25).
God wants to remove the wrong labels from your child’s life. He doesn’t care what the doctors, or nurses, or anyone else thinks about your child because your child is really His. And He thinks your child is pretty special.
Tomorrow, we are going to look at the specific dangers our children face if they adopt their label or disease as their identity. We’ll also talk about how to combat those dangers and what will happen when they become who they were meant to be, a “Child of God”.
In His Love,
Kimberly
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